Promise Emmanuel, the Senior Special Assistant to Kogi State Governor on Cybercrime, also known as Kogi Rebel, has sparked a heated online debate by asserting that dowries were originally intended only for women who are virgins. In a post on social media, Emmanuel argued that the bride price is meant to honor the father for raising a daughter who remained 'untouched' until marriage.
Emmanuel's argument on dowry and virginity
According to Emmanuel, dowries are a biblical and religious concept that rewards the father for preserving his daughter's virginity. He wrote: 'Dowries are meant to be ONLY paid on and for a woman who is a VIRGIN. The money is to honor her Father for raising a child that is untouched before being handed over to another man. It is in all the Holy Books and religion.'
He further claimed that many women today are no longer virgins before marriage, having been 'touched and used more than Direct Toks.' He attributed this to the monetization of relationships and women's desire for expensive lifestyles, including phones, bags, shoes, and vacations, which they acquire through transactional relationships.
Call to scrap bride price for non-virgins
Emmanuel argued that since many women are not virgins, the practice of paying dowry should be scrapped. He stated: 'Hence, bride price or dowry payment which also comes with orishirishi demands should be scrapped. The society should stop rewarding what is not sincere anymore.' He also noted that women demanding equality with men should not expect dowry payments.
He proposed an alternative: if the culture is hard to change, women should get pregnant first before marriage or commitment is given through dowry. He referenced 'Edo Baba' as having suggested that having children is the most significant thing a woman can do, and those ready to have kids should be honored with dowry.
Response to modern relationships
Emmanuel criticized women who behave like men and do not want children, suggesting they should not receive dowry or marital commitment. He wrote: 'Those who behave like men and also do not want to have kids should never have any dowry paid on them or get commitment to marriage. Everybody should be piping and moving on.'
He concluded that the benefit of modern marriage for men is children, and if women attack that benefit, men should respond by not rewarding that movement. His post has generated widespread reactions, with many criticizing his views as outdated and misogynistic.
