Tonto Dikeh, a Nollywood actress turned evangelist, has ignited a lively debate with her candid advice to Christian men about courtship. In a video shared on her social media page on Wednesday, July 1, 2026, she urged men to stop hiding behind spiritual language as a substitute for genuine effort when pursuing women for marriage. According to Dikeh, many Christian brothers have adopted a “low-effort” approach in relationships, often using statements like “God told me you are my wife” to bypass intentionality and practical steps.
Calling Out Spiritual Laziness
Dikeh began her message with a lighthearted tone, saying, “This is a very funny topic, but it is one that we actually need to discuss. So, if you are a brother in the Lord, come forward; this is for you.” She questioned why some Christian men believe women in church do not deserve thoughtful gestures during courtship. “Why do church brothers think church sisters don’t require gifts? What about this low-effort thing you put into wooing or pursuing a woman? Church brothers would say, ‘God sent me to you,’ and blah, blah.”
She emphasized that while divine guidance is valid, using it to mask emotional laziness distorts God’s character. “God can send you, but using spiritual language to mask emotional laziness is a distortion of God’s character. Saying, ‘God told me you are my wife,’ is not an excuse to bypass intentionality and practical effort,” she argued. Dikeh supported her stance by citing several biblical passages, though specific verses were not mentioned in the video.
A Call for Excellence in Relationships
The actress-turned-evangelist stressed that women of God deserve to be cherished and treated with excellence. “A woman of God deserves to be cherished, respected, and treated with excellence. Spiritual maturity should elevate your standards, not lower them,” she said. She concluded with a strong message urging Christian men to abandon shortcuts in relationships and step up their efforts.
This advice comes amid ongoing discussions about gender roles and expectations in Christian circles. Dikeh’s comments have resonated with many women who feel undervalued in church-based relationships, while some men have pushed back against her characterization.
Mixed Reactions from Netizens
The video quickly sparked heated debate on social media, with many female netizens sharing personal experiences that aligned with Dikeh’s views. Blessing Ehinomen Mpama recounted, “I remember one church brother that gave me gift and some money. When we ended the courtship, the brother told me to give all his gift back.” Orizu ChiNonso offered a different perspective, commenting, “Church sisters wey sabi form holy holy before Church brothers but before the guy outside who doesn't attend Church she is a Baddie.”
Nduka Ebere dismissed the criticism, saying, “The bible never said he who finds a wife finds a liability and alamajiris.” Nkongho Ayuk supported Dikeh, writing, “Very very important. My same thoughts today. Men underestimate and undervalue Christian women alot, as if they don't deserve to be loved and cherished properly too.”
Broader Context of Dikeh’s Ministry
This is not the first time Tonto Dikeh has addressed relationship issues from a Christian perspective. In a related development, Legit.ng previously reported that her former husband, Olakunle Churchill, called out Nigerian men after noticing that women engaged more with his Instagram posts. Additionally, Dikeh recently reacted to allegations made by her former bestie, Doris Ogala, who claimed she was paid to keep quiet about an alleged relationship with Pastor Fatoyinbo. Dikeh appeared unbothered in a video response, dismissing the claims.
Dikeh’s message has struck a chord with many, highlighting a perceived gap between spiritual rhetoric and practical action in Christian courtship. As the debate continues, her call for intentionality and genuine effort remains a focal point for discussion among believers.
