In a move highlighting the caution surrounding international relationships, an American woman has shared her story of hiring a private investigator to conduct a thorough background check on her Nigerian fiancé before agreeing to marriage.
From TikTok to Trust: An Unconventional Love Story
Clarissa Zoe Arokodare, a songwriter, met her husband in a most modern way: through the social media platform TikTok. She first connected with the brother of her husband's late wife, who then facilitated the introduction. Clarissa emphasized that this endorsement was significant to her. "The fact that her own brother introduced him to me speaks volumes about the kind of person my husband is," she stated in an interview.
She noted that she had already given up on relationships when they met. However, a prior positive exposure to Yoruba culture through another Nigerian man in New York had planted a seed of interest. What ultimately drew her to her future husband was his evident dedication to family and the care he showed for his children.
Overcoming the Fear of Romance Scams
Despite the growing connection, Clarissa admitted to harbouring fears of becoming a victim of a romance scam, a prevalent concern for many engaging in online relationships with Nigerians. To address these fears head-on, she took a decisive step.
Before traveling to Lagos for the first time in October 2024, she hired a private investigator based in the city to verify every detail her husband had shared about his life. The investigator's report came back clean, confirming his honesty. Beyond the formal check, her husband's transparency solidified her trust. "He showed me exactly where he lived, even when he wasn't proud of it. He told me plainly; 'This is me. Take me as I am,'" she recounted. He also never asked her for money, even refusing an offer of help during a difficult period.
Family Concerns and a Happy Ending
Her family initially had reservations, influenced by a cousin's past negative experience with a Nigerian man. However, her husband's consistent honesty and integrity eventually won them over. "Today, they have nothing negative to say," Clarissa shared.
Their relationship progressed quickly after her initial one-week trip to Nigeria turned into a six-week stay. He proposed in November 2024 at Leola Hotel in Maryland, Ikeja, Lagos, and they were married in April 2025. Clarissa describes their bond as one rooted in healing, respect, and intentional love, which has helped her recover from past emotional wounds.
